How important is it for children to set up their life direction as soon as possible?

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At present, education has been simplified into a straight line for further studies. All the processes exist only for that final result: going to Peking University or Harvard. No one told these children what to do after going to Peking University or Harvard. Since then, has life become a smooth road and will not encounter all kinds of troubles, hardships and difficulties?

I am just busy finding what kind of school, what kind of teacher, what kind of conditions to provide for my children, how much knowledge to teach my students, and how many scores to improve my students. These are all lazy practices and in fact give up my educational responsibilities as parents and teachers.

Life is a journey to discover oneself, and the road depends on oneself step by step. Recognizing what kind of person you will become in the future is like a lighthouse in the distance, which can continuously illuminate the way forward.

These cattle children seem to be made of molds.

In the first half of this year, I went to Shanghai to interview students. The students made very careful preparations, one by one bright, just like the application materials provided by them.

    Without exception, every student has excellent academic performance-at least in the top 5% of grade; Outstanding artistic expertise-at least one musical instrument; He has won scientific and technological innovation awards at all levels-at least the second prize at the municipal level; Enthusiastic public welfare undertakings-at least go to the nursing home to wash the feet of the elderly once; Wait.

While lamenting the high comprehensive quality of Shanghai students, I also have a faint regret: he or she looks too perfect to see any shortcomings; They also look too similar, just like a group of [furniture] made of a mold.

Including his or her performance in the interview is also very similar. One by one, sitting upright, smiling without showing his or her teeth; When speaking, he spoke clearly and cadenced, as if he were reciting a poem affectionately.

A student came up and said [Confucius] I interrupted him and asked him his name was what. After he told me, he went on to say [Confucius]. I interrupted him again and told him that I didn’t care what Zi said. I cared about what you wanted to say about what. But he blushed and couldn’t say a word.

Another student sat confidently in front of me, waiting for me to ask all possible questions, as if everything was under control. I said, I don’t have what questions to ask you, do you have what questions to ask me? She didn’t expect me to ask such a question at all. She immediately panicked, tongue-tied and almost cried.

Obviously, all the students have received some degree of interview training before coming and have seen at least a little [treasure book] on how to deal with the interview, but probably no one has told them that I am not interested in who they are, I am interested in who they are.

What surprises me most is that when I ask him or her what kind of person you want to be in the future, few people can answer it. The students told me that he or she had never thought about this question at all.

Where did the dream fly?

Did you really never think about it? In fact, it is not. He (she) once thought about this problem, but it was so long ago that even he (she) himself forgot it.

When I was a child, whenever adults asked children, do you want to be what when you grow up? Children always answer happily: scientists, astronauts, pilots, police uncles (aunts)…

However, when the children go to school, These questions were never raised again, It seems that it has never appeared. Listening in class, Go home to do homework and take remedial classes, these are the whole life of the students. As for the children’s interest in what, what kind of person to become when they grow up and live a how life, it seems that no one cares, even if the children themselves do not care. Almost all teachers, parents and students only care about one thing: how many points do they score and can go to what School.

A growth trajectory recognized as a good student, or a perfect education roadmap imagined by parents, looks like this: go to the best kindergarten in the area; Before going to primary school, I knew a lot of Chinese characters, could do complicated math problems, could recite many classic and famous articles in large sections, and spoke fluent English. After that, he went to the best primary and secondary schools in the area. Admitted to the best universities in China-Peking University and Tsinghua; After graduating from college, go to Harvard, the best university in the world, etc. Of course, many people have been aiming at Eaton, Exeter and other prestigious universities since junior high school. Not to mention that not everyone can achieve these goals, even if all of them are achieved, then what? What is the goal of life?

I would like to ask: how after entering Peking University?

This is not what I imagined. Over the years, I have seen many excellent children all over the world. All of them are talented, hard-working, have passed all the way, have never failed, and are always among the top groups of their peers. Choosing the best schools and classes is the envy of others. However, few people can observe the pain and confusion in their hearts.

Many students from Peking University or Harvard told me that going to Peking University or Harvard was the goal they set up since childhood, but one day when they were really in the campus that appeared in their dreams countless times, they often fell into deep anxiety: should they be what next? As if a mountaineer were confused on Mount Everest: Where is the next mountain?

Life needs goals, But society, schools and families have not taught children how to find and set their own goals. Our understanding of life and education is too single. And lack of imagination. We always ask our children to succeed. To be better than others, To get into the best school, they are rarely told that success means what, where life’s happiness comes from, and what is the most suitable for them. Education is simplified into a straight line for further studies. All the processes exist only for that final result: going to Peking University or Harvard. No one tells these children what to do after going to Peking University or Harvard? Since then, has life become a smooth road and will not encounter all kinds of troubles, hardships and difficulties? In 1923, Lu Xun once asked thought-provoking, “how after Nora left?” I would also like to ask: [how after entering Peking University? ]

Children who awaken their potential will have infinite motivation.

The purpose of going to school is to receive a good education. But just as savings cannot be automatically converted into investment, Going to school does not necessarily mean receiving a good education. The reason why we send our children to school is that, It is not because children have to go to school, but because they have to be fully prepared for the future life. Going to school is a process that one must go through in order to achieve one’s life goals. In this process, the most important and first thing is to realize what kind of person you will become in the future.

It is not easy to do this. Everyone comes to the world with a unique mission, which is the value of an independent individual. The difference is that some people can discover their mission and finally achieve great achievements. Some people did not find their mission, and eventually they did nothing and lived for a lifetime. Just like marriage, [a radish, a pit], everyone has his own [unique]. Some people find the [unique] that matches them, and marriage is happy. If some people do not find it, marriage will not be happy, at least not happy.

Although one’s life is long, There seems to be a lot of things to do, But what can really be done, But there is only one thing. This is one’s mission to come to the world. Discovering that mission cannot rely on [apocalypse]-although many people do suddenly realize their mission in dreams or flashes of light-education is the most important and fundamental means. The value of education lies in awakening the potential in every child’s heart. Help them find the special mission hidden in their bodies and the one thing they are destined to do.

This is the real challenge that every school and every family faces in education. And which school to go to, Compared with how many points on the test, Knowing what kind of person you will become in the future is a more important and fundamental goal. Avoiding or ignoring this problem, I am just busy finding what kind of school, what kind of teacher, what kind of conditions to provide for my children, how much knowledge to teach my students, and how many scores to improve my students. These are all lazy practices and in fact give up my educational responsibilities as parents and teachers.

In fact, once a child realizes what kind of person he will become in the future, Will inspire endless motivation from the heart to strive to achieve their goals. Numerous research results have proved that, For human growth, This endogenous driving force is far greater than the force imposed from outside. It is also much more effective. We should be soberly aware that, Life is not a game programmed by others, As long as time and money are invested, Configure more powerful [equipment] to clear the customs. Once the customs clearance is completed, At the end of the game, life will immediately face the situation of no way out. Life is a journey to discover oneself, and the road must be walked step by step by oneself. Recognizing what kind of person one will become in the future is like a lighthouse in the distance, which can continuously illuminate the way forward.

Keep trying and making mistakes and find your favorite.

Know that you like what? Make a negative list first

Only then can how know what kind of person he will become in the future? In other words, how can we discover the special potential in our life? Everyone’s method may be different, but the most important thing is to listen to your inner voice, find your real interest and realize why your life will come, just like Jobs, who was born only for Apple.

In general, All outstanding people, The result of doing anything will not be too bad. The real difficulty is to distinguish whether it is something you really like. The way to judge whether you really like it or not is very simple. Is to see if you are obsessed with it, Whether you can willingly devote your time and energy to it regardless of utility and stick to it all the time. True obsession is a state of lovesickness. During the day, At night, Even in my dreams, I can’t help laughing when I think of him or her. I think of him or her when I see anything, and I talk to others all about him or her. I am excited, crazy and even crazy. It is a state of immersion in happiness. [No madness, no survival]. If I can’t reach this state, even if I don’t have obsession, I won’t be really interested.

I suggest that every student, No matter how heavy the schoolwork is, Make sure you take some time to be alone every day, Leave a little gentle space in your heart and listen to your deep desires in a completely relaxed state. Sometimes, you can also take out a blank sheet of paper and write down your thoughts. No matter how childish, ridiculous or even shocking these thoughts look, it doesn’t matter. It is written for yourself and has nothing to do with others.

Some people say that I just have no feeling for anything. I don’t know that I like what or even that I don’t like what. What should I do? A good way is to try and make mistakes. Keep trying everything and get rid of the things you don’t like in the process of trying. Make yourself a negative list. Don’t be afraid of failure. For students, the cost of failure is very small. As long as they haven’t been expelled or dropped out of school, the big deal is to return to class and start all over again.

Be patient enough with yourself. Not everyone is sure to find his [the right person], It takes time and effort. Don’t worry when you can’t find it. Take your time, But we must keep looking for it. If you find it, you may not find it. But if you don’t find it, you won’t find it. At the same time, you must have confidence in yourself. Since you are here for this matter, no one can steal it. It doesn’t matter if you find it earlier or later. The important thing is that you like it from the heart. Remember Grandma Moses, who picked up the paintbrush when she was 77 years old in the United States? Her story tells us that as long as you really like to do something, it is too late to start at any time, even if you are 80 years old.

Life is not only a period of life, but also a period of quality. To judge whether a period of life has quality is to see whether each day is the day you really want to live. As long as you find something you really like, even if it is only one day, it is a happy and quality life.

Source: www.hizy.net Genuine Photo Library/Vision China