After the two-child policy was opened, many mothers began to wonder whether to add another younger brother and sister to their baby.
However, with the growth of age and the increasing pressure of life, it is not easy to have another baby.
On the way to prepare for a second child, mothers have not only joy and excitement, but also some sadness and pain.
We received a contribution from a mother who had twists and turns on the way to prepare for her second child.
I have been considering whether to write down my experience. It has been half a month and I feel that my body and mind have calmed down a lot. Today, I will sit down and stroke the process calmly, which may be of some help to you who are preparing for a second child.
Hesitated, finally began to prepare for a second child
I am 40 years old, Husband 42 years old, there is a 10-year-old son, smart, lovely. Family income is good, have a house, a car, savings, and parents to help with the children, said it is also in line with the external conditions of having a second child. Before, because of various reasons also did not consider to have a second child, especially husband did not have this idea, moreover, I am also busy at work, so I have not considered it.
With the opening of the national two-child policy, more and more friends and relatives around have given birth to two children one after another or started to prepare for a second child, and our family is beginning to feel uneasy.
First of all, parents keep saying in their ears: no matter how much money they have, it is not as important as many children, and they will not be lonely after giving their children many companions, etc.
My husband also began to have ideas. For me, the most important thing is because of my son’s strong request. He really wants us to add another brother or sister to him.
All right! I also began to prepare for a second child… … …
The newly conceived second child is gone.
At the beginning of 2016, I thought I was old (38 years old at that time +) and it should not be so easy to conceive a second child. Therefore, I was not so attentive and began not to use contraception.
However, the third month actually had, my husband and I were very surprised, of course more joy.
I went to have a blood test as soon as I was pregnant, All indicators are normal, I also have no idea of asking for leave to protect the fetus, or normal work, business trip, flew to Yunnan to attend the company’s quarterly management meeting. After coming back to check again, the blood index is not very good, HCG doubles, not ideal, although uneasy in my heart, but think that there is no bleeding or other discomfort, should be fine.
When I was pregnant for more than 50 days, I went to do B-ultrasound and saw that the gestational sac did not see the fetal heart. This really felt bad. After a week of reexamination, B-ultrasound still did not see the fetal heart. The doctor suggested abortion. For the first time, my second child was gone like this…
Thinking maybe it is really old, the embryo survival of the fittest, but at that time several post-90s pregnant mother colleagues also happened the same situation as me-fetus stop. Age seems not to be the most important reason, perhaps the current living environment, work pressure and diet are all influencing factors.
Those who discuss with their husbands are still not giving birth, are they? What impressed me was my son’s eager eyes and the pity of seeing other babies.
Prepare for pregnancy for the second time, be more cautious and careful.
After resting for half a year, I started my second pregnancy preparation.
This time, I did some preparatory work, started taking folic acid orally early, did various physical examinations before pregnancy, asked my friend to hang up the number of the famous old Chinese medicine doctor (Dr. He Jialin), and began to recuperate …..
After eating bitter and hard-to-drink traditional Chinese medicine for nearly 3 months, I even took the traditional Chinese medicine with me when I went abroad, and insisted on it all day long. At the beginning of March this year, I found out that I was pregnant.
This time, I dare not be capricious any more. I will try my best to push off what I can do at work. I will give up long-distance business trips and try my best to relax without so much pressure.
About seven weeks, B-ultrasound showed embryo and fetal heart, The mood is happy, but the body is not comfortable. I started the legendary pregnancy vomiting reaction. The vomiting was called uncomfortable (when I gave birth to Dabao, I didn’t vomit basically. Only when I ate watermelon did I vomit a few mouthfuls). This time I realized the uncomfortable feeling of early pregnancy. However, I didn’t vomit to the level of infusion to the hospital like Zhu Dan, so it was not bad.
The weight was more than 2kg lighter than before pregnancy and fell to within 100 (52 kg before pregnancy, 163 cm tall, and she has been exercising and exercising all the time, so her body and figure are not bad).
After 12 weeks of pregnancy, all the vomiting reactions disappeared and everything returned to normal, except that the chest was two cups bigger than before pregnancy.
12 thoughtful community card, the rest are normal, but B ultrasound showed that the average thickness of neck NT is about 0.26 cm, the critical value, my feeling is not good again. Although the doctor was relieved to say that the last time a pregnant woman made it was 5 cm, it was good in the end.
The next day, I don’t know whether it is psychological effect or indeed walking too much. I actually suffered from vaginal bleeding and bright red. I went to the hospital for examination. The fetal heart was good. The doctor let me rest, reduce walking, try not to climb stairs and observe for a few days. On the same day, I made an appointment for non-invasive DNA examination and took a few tubes of blood for examination. These days, I feel uneasy…
Vaginal bleeding stopped flowing after a few days, and the mood was more stable, but the non-invasive examination results did not come out, and there were still various worries.
Another blow: The second child may be Down’s
A week or so, my friend told me the verbal result that trisomy 21 was at high risk. It was like a bolt from the blue to be really worried about what in what. Our husband and wife were both doing medical-related work. Knowing that this meant what, my husband cried at that time.
The accuracy rate of non-invasive results is 99%, and there is still 1% hope. We have made a non-stop appointment for amniocentesis in the provincial women’s insurance hospital. Pregnant women are 40 years old, and the probability of Down’s children has increased to 1%. The non-invasive results show that we have unfortunately become the 1%. At the same time, we also hope that the accuracy rate of non-invasive 99% is another 1%.
In 18 weeks, I had amniocentesis. Although there were many worries and fears before, it was not what compared with the baby’s health.
The fact is also true, sheep wear is not so terrible, just a relatively long needle into your stomach into the amniotic cavity, extracted 3 tubes of amniotic fluid. As long as not nervous, relaxed, no pain. When pumping amniotic fluid, there is a little uncomfortable feeling, a minute passed.
Waiting for the result is the most worrying thing.
Three days later, I received a text message from the hospital. I was still not lucky enough to change the result. Like the oral report, it was still possible for trisomy 21.
Think about all tears, how can my baby be Down’s son? The child is not good, and it is irresponsible for him or her to be born. We discussed whether to believe in the current medicine and not to risk suffering future children.
The following is a painful wait. The paper report will not be available until 4 weeks later. Only when the paper report is obtained can the hospital give the final diagnosis result and plan after expert discussion.
My stomach is getting bigger day by day, perhaps because of my second child. I have been able to feel the baby’s fetal movement in 16 weeks.
In desperation, he gave up his 21-week-old baby.
At the time of 21 weeks and 6 days, I was admitted to the hospital and was ready to induce labor. Fetal movements were already very frequent…
After being hospitalized, I did all kinds of examinations and everything was ready. I signed the red list recommended by the doctor to induce labor.
At 3: 30 p.m. The doctor, guided by B-ultrasound, positioned my abdomen and laid a needle-rivanol injection to promote uterine contraction. The doctor said that basically 24-36 hours or so will start, but there are also 72 hours to start, everyone’s situation is different.
The next day was Friday. There was no strange feeling during the day. The baby was still moving until 7 ~ 8 pm. I felt that the baby’s activities were obviously less. I could hardly feel him moving. I thought that the baby was really pitiful.
Induced labor is as painful as childbirth.
At 11 o’clock in the evening, I began to have uterine contraction, but it was not very painful. After midnight, I felt more and more painful (my first child was delivered by caesarean section, and the uterine contraction pain had already been dissected before). Before, I just [heard that it was very painful], but I didn’t feel it. I am a relatively pain-resistant constitution, and I can endure general pain.
At two o’clock in the morning, the nurse came to check the opening of the lower uterus and said that the cervical opening was still long and not soft. It was estimated that it would not be born in the middle of the night. I think, well, only the doctor on duty downstairs in the middle of the night, and the next day, the doctor in this ward went to work and was managed by someone, which was better.
I didn’t sleep for a minute one night, but my husband slept soundly on the sofa.
All right, I’ll endure it again. I won’t disturb you. When the contractions come, I have to grab the handle of the bed.
I stayed up until six o’clock in the morning, and when it was dawn, my pain became more frequent and severe.
I woke up my husband and asked the nurse to check it again, but the result was still not opened. I was really desperate and had to wait until what to open the uterus.
The next hour was the deepest pain I had felt in the past 40 years, which could not be described in words. I was already in a manic state of pain. Even if I had been dissected directly, I would like to…
At seven o’clock in the morning, I called the nurse, and I begged to see if the uterus was open again. The nurse said that she could not check the uterine orifice frequently. She had just seen it an hour ago and should be still early. Shit! With so many regulations, I am dying of pain. How long will it last?
As soon as the nurse left, I felt a feeling of defecation relief. I heard people say that this is about to give birth. Husband ran out again to call the nurse (the nurse on the night shift was also tortured). This time, she immediately wore gloves to check and did not take out her hand. The original first layer of fetal membrane was broken and the fetal head was already seen. It was definitely too late to send it to the delivery room.
She blocked my vagina with one hand, and called the doctor on duty and the doctor in the delivery room with the other hand, and all kinds of disinfection utensils before her death. Five minutes of personnel and things in place, put on me at the same time, the nurse is still calling me to breathe, learning to spit out the air, the original purpose is not to exert oneself when uterine contraction, not ready, not exerting oneself.
After everything was ready, the uterus contracted and exerted itself. I felt a heat flow gushing out. I didn’t know it was what, but it might be amniotic fluid.
Another burst of uterine contraction pain and then exerted force, feeling that something was squeezed out, a burst of ease, also don’t hurt, should be the baby was born.
I heard the doctor say: at 7: 20 in the morning, the baby boy, stillbirth, 600g, everything is over…